Have some steps to work on step 8, going to do a 9^th step this week, thats on my agenda this week that I already discussed with my AA sponsor.have some commitments to do


Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Went to church this morning, vised R today, updated some information, have business to do on Monday. Have my 1^st appointment with my therapist on Tuesday before work.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Visited R today, went to an AA meeting @ Marin Alano club. I made peace with some acquaintances today as well. Doing a meeting tomorrow

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Worked a bit today, talked to YV, put in a lot of hours at TSA, met with AA sponsor today

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Made progress with my steps, and home work for my sponsor, picked up a 5 year sobriety chip last night. Made progress in some of my admissions

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Finally finished writing things down for my sponsor, so I guess its on to step 8 I go onward in AA, I still am growing up as an individual, I feel sometimes I wasted part of my sobriety away, rather than focusing more in depth on educational, employment, and other goals. But I thought I was doing the proper thing at the time for myself.

I have something good happening soon, my own apartment no sober roommates, no roommates no in the program just me, myself & I. And not much else, finally ill do something about my gas guzzling 4x4 truck and likely will still ride mass transit as it is pretty darn good in northern California.

I backed up some files recently to my server, I also start school Aug. 20^th 2012, so life is good. It could be better, but some of us in recovery prosper and grow at different paces.

I continue to prosper as an individual in many ways, I am making huge progress in DA,SLAA, OA as well as my original program AA, perhaps I am addicted to 12-step programs.

But progress and getting here didn't come at a price, I hurt some and embarrassed others and brought shame to my self. But I don't dwell on the past or past transgressions.

I made peace with my inner demons, and learned the hard way to “let go”. My selfishness has not been without consequence, I lost a few acquaintances, friendships and family members. I learned to put these relations in gods hands. And hope time of rehabilitation of my life, will heal old wounds, if they ever get healed.

I missed KM & KM today the plans feel into the gutter, I feel hurt and stood up somewhat, but than again BGK used to say I did that all the time, and yes he was correct, I need to become less selfish and more dependable as an individual, at times I become lazy and unsettled.

My plans to take a trip and move out of Marin are on hold after discussing things with a close friend, I'm going to hang around while for the better until I have my affairs in order. But after I get settled in my new place, I'm planing to focusing on my 2003 ford ranger FX4 and than after its registered, insured, and smogged, and inspected I still plan a trip to Los Angles to see a old friend from LAMBDA center in Houston Texas that had 3 months when I walked through the doors again. And this guy stayed sober all these years, and we linked back up via the INTERNET.

Furthermore, I plan to visit my uncle in New Orleans via Amtrak and help him do a few things and visit and look up a old friend or two I haven't seen since I moved to California who I think is in the New Orleans metro area again from northern Louisiana where he lived post Katrina.

My 5 years of sobriety has had dark spots, and mental blackouts and just dumb idiotic choices, and bad karma, sometimes I'm not sure how to face old friends and foes in San Francisco and people I rubbed the wrong way. I suppose thats why step 8 & step 9 are separate steps. Step 8 you discuss them with your AA sponsor, and step 9 you actually go and do the ones you mutually feel are right.

I'm not sure how to make amends to MLS OR MCG or others CW & LR would be bad, and PF would be bad too. I dont think its a good idea to drag other people into my step work, perhaps buying coffee or putting a extra dollar in the basket would be the right thing to do, we discussed this at a STAG meeting I have started attending, I picked the topic.

Soon to be off probation, September 7^th, 2012, life looks good.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

The reality of life I made progress in my imperfections and defects of personality. I have grown a lot, had better news today....I continue to grow as an Individual somewhat and prosper, I made peace with some of my past. But I struggle to find myself through individuality and choose the path I want out of life.............perhaps time will change for the better.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Ive grown a bit over the years, peculiarity the last few years, but in faith and spirit I'm not always so sure the proper path to life, big choices that could have drastic effects over the next few years of my life are shortly ahead..........time to make big choices........more details to follow.....

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Taking life moving into my own apartment likely soon, perhaps I wont have to leave Marin, I sort of fell in love with it and I have a love hate relationship so to speak, but I'm going to stick around awhile till I get my affairs in order than eventually move to southern California out near the ocean perhaps.

Ive changed a lot as an individual in the past few years in many ways and grown up greatly.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Had a productive and sucessful day at TSA, made progess towards my goals. I conitnue to grow up as an individual. Made serious personal progress but playing phone tag with someone...more details to follow....

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

I made progress in most of my goals the past 2 years, I'm a better person than 5 years ago yet in some ways im less of a person than in my 31 years on earth I sometimes dont feel Im where I should be in life. But I accept my circumstances of life.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Met with e this morning, took care of business saw RD this morning, and YV pondering life after STAR im a much better person but unhappy searching for myself again somewhat.

Pondering the meaning of life, had somewhat of a progressive day, doing a H&I meeting tonight @ at MGH with a speaker.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Meeting with Toni @ collage of Marin today, had a good morning taking care of business. Updated my website(s) somewhat. Backed up files to my server.

Working on a few other stuff talked to KM today. And YV.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Have to go back to Collage of Marin on Monday, and work on other educational goals......

spoke to RM today, worked on my websites and backed up files to my personal server farm.

Working on a few other goals such as obtaining letters from the community for my expunger.

Continuing to make my AA,DA,OA,SLAA Goals.

Going to a meeting later today at Marin Alano Club

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Met with sponsor today, took care of business at Collage of Marin, working on another school too in Marin. Have to go back to collage of Marin tomorrow to take care of business. Met with my AA sponsor today, starting school after Aug. 20^th 2012

Progress not perfection attended Marin Alano club today and fellowshipped, my roommate deal is not the best as I approach my 5th year sobriety date of [7/13/2007] Ive had ups and downs in sobriety and some very deep dark places, as well as my OA, DA , SLAA programs sometimes quickly sometimes slowly we grow, some folks dont always put things in gods hands per say, but I do.

Ive grown a lot the past few years and look forward to getting off probation early September 7^th 2012

and Ive started my expungement process and in the process of getting letters shortly there after and starting my productive life over.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Slept OK, very well better than usual had a big breakfast skipping lunch, going to noon meeting @ Marin Alano club. Hope my sponsor comes to the meeting and doesn't get too busy with homework...school starts Aug 20^th 2012. more details to follow.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Saw a wacko that needs help yesterday at the San Rafael Transit Center, glad they moved up to Sonoma county, ran that freak show off by enforcing the 30 minute rule @ Marin Alano club a while back..... more Marin Alano club members should be like me.


this freakshow.... was also sleeping at @ marin alano club..not cool




Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

Making my finance goals, paid rent on time. Taking care of business going to check out the other school today. Looking forward toward the 8^th and 9^th step after I discuss them with my wonderful AA sponsor.

Might take a swimming class at COM, and a fitness class for credits. Talked to DLG today, conditioning to search for a therapist and make progress in my rehabilitation. Planning on going to GGYPAA @ fort mason on july 4^th.

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com

MIGHT go to fort mason on July 4^th for a GGYPAA AA meeting potluck and BBQ, currently @ Collage of Marin to meet with the DSP Councilor. IK is meeting me there.

May have met someone of romantic interest...more details to follow.

Have to pay the rent today, and continue to save $

Leigh McInnis Gaetjens PO Box 150063 San Rafael, CA 94915-0063 (415) 572-4169 lmgaetjens@gmail.com